People work hard at Hart’s Mill, traveling distances to come to meetings, work days, social gatherings, workshops, not to mention doing research, making phone calls, and preparing agendas and materials in-between. We have accomplished a lot and built bonds of strong connection in the process.
But lately, we find ourselves still in the thick of an architectural process that has not yet brought us to the finish line despite over a year of consistent engagement in an intentional process between skilled and well meaning people.
Hmmm, could we be missing something? How about if we add a different ingredient to the mix and see what happens? It was in this spirit that members María Silvia and Joe Cole offered their home and expertise to facilitate a Sharing Circle on July 2nd.
Nine Hart’s Mill members gathered in the “tower” at María and Joe’s home. After a thorough and helpful introduction to the process and setting an intention to deeply listen and receive each other, we began to speak, one at a time….
According to community consultant, Laird Schaub, the purpose of a Sharing Circle (or Heart Circle) is to give participants an opportunity to speak, without interruption and generally without time limits, on something that is meaningful to them or a topic the group has chosen. These sessions can be powerful community building experiences and may be used for these reasons:
- When the group wants to go deeper together and strengthen bonds with one another.
- To share feelings, issues, or concerns that don’t easily come up in regular meetings.
- When the group wants to access more information about a topic that can’t be achieved by normal discussion in meetings.
- When the group is dealing with an emotional situation—a member leaving, a death of someone significant to the group, an emotionally hard situation, etc.
- It can be a time for just sharing with one another, whatever is in your heart about your life at the moment.
- Generally it is not used for making decisions or to resolve a specific conflict (although it is a great forum for people to reflect on what is going on and their feelings about a contentious situation or conflict the group or individuals are experiencing).
…and each person had the space and time to express what was in their hearts about where we find ourselves now. Comments were infused with thoughtful reflections–hopes and dreams, grief and frustration, joy and gratitude, unresolved questions, excitement about possibilities, commitment to the vision of Hart’s Mill and what it could become and hold for each of us—all poured into the circle space and held with respect and love by the listeners until our cups were both emptied and filled according to each person’s need.
As for me, I was astonished to feel mainly delight and deep caring for the Hart’s Mill vision emerge when it was my turn. Far from venting my fears and concerns, I dropped into a stream where commitment, passion, love, and possibility infused the waters that we swim in together—may they be rough or smooth—and tears of joy and gratitude for all we are and all we mean to create and become together flowed freely.
The entire process lasted less than two hours. After the final words were spoken, we continued to sit in silence, loath to leave the richness and connection created in this simple, almost primal way. It was as though we had just watched a really good movie together and didn’t want to exit the theater even after the credits finished rolling and the lights came up. Gradually, we stretched and stood and made our way out into the world, carrying this experience of connection with us…
The effect of the Sharing Circle on the architectural issue remains to be seen, but that we who participated were touched, moved, and heartened in various ways was evident. Joe and María have generously offered to facilitate more Sharing Circles at Hart’s Mill with topics ranging from the open-ended to specific. Your whole-hearted engagement is welcome! 
NEXT SHARING CIRCLE: Thursday, July 20, 7pm, Chapel Hill. Contact María Silvia for information. Please RSVP if you plan to come: mariastawsky@gmail.com
Hope,
Thank you for this information, and spirit you share!